Minute With Maxwell: DEVELOPING YOURSELF - John Maxwell Team

Make Yourself Interesting and Learn to Talk to Strangers

As a senior person many my age complain they are lonely and have nothing much to do. In other words, they are bored and frustrated. When one reaches a certain age it seems that you are no longer needed and when you ask for help from family members they often develop a problem with their health or mind that prevents them from taking you on. At least that is my experience.

Fortunately, I am neither lonely or bored but sometimes get frustrated. My life has always been full of interesting journeys and achievements. That has led me to write articles, like this one, publish some books, build my web sites, and join in conversations with people on social media, and so on.

It is, however, only a part of my reaching out and being accepted. Because of my interest in most things friends can be made as simply as talking to someone in the supermarket. Yesterday, for instance, I was looking for a special extending broom in one particular shop. A lady was looking at something else when I casually pointed out that it looked interesting.

Notice What You've Chosen And Simply Choose Again

Sometimes I Wish I Knew Better

Think about a recent mistake and consider how things could have turned out differently for you. Whilst hindsight is a wonderful faculty, it can often make us feel guilt and remorseful for our actions. I want to reassure you that every choice we make is made with the awareness and level of consciousness available to us at the time. However, this does not excuse us from repeating the same mistakes. We are the product of our thinking and until we expand our consciousness, we are bound to repeat our mistakes. That's where hindsight works to our advantage. With a new level of awareness, we can look forward to the future knowing we are not constrained by our mistakes but learn to make better decisions based on the past.

Many people make mistakes they regret. How about you? Are you still holding on to regret from the past or have you made peace with them? I realise it is difficult to let go of the past. But, we can take comfort knowing we did our best at the time and hopefully we won't repeat the same mistakes. This is why we mustn't punish ourselves but notice what we've chosen and simply choose again; this time more wisely. This is the advice echoed by Dr. Alex Lickerman who writes in The Undefeated Mind: On the Science of Constructing an Indestructible Self: "But we needn't waste time in recriminations or in wishing we could go back in time to change what happened. We can turn that hurt or regret into a catalyst for personal growth, into motivation for examining the reasons we made the choice in the first place and for asking ourselves how we might change to avoid making the same mistake again." I've made countless mistakes in my 20s about my health and career choices. Sometimes I wish I knew better, however I didn't have the awareness as I do now and was choosing to the best of my ability. In a recent conversation with a coaching client, she complimented me on my wisdom to help her overcome her challenges. As I considered the compliment, it reminded me of the countless mistakes I made over the years. In fact, gaining wisdom has little to do with the books I read, the courses attended or the people I surround myself with. Whilst they are important, it was the numerous mistakes I made, and the lessons gained that cultivated good judgement.